You don't need a shark to be mauled in Perth

 To all our international visitors to Western Australia........

If you are worried about the possibility of being mauled by a shark whilst in WA, don't worry. The chances are still very rare.
 
But, if you are the sort of tourist who is into a 'jolly good mauling', we can guarantee you the time of your life....on the land!

The 'mauling' can start when you get off the plane and want to exchange money at the monopoly FOREX booth in the customs hall where you will pay an additional 12% for Aussie dollars compared to anywhere overseas. Then you get another 30% less for your currency because of the strong Aussie currency.

Then maybe you could walk into a cafe and buy a coffee for (if you are from Singapore) around SGD$6.00. Or perhaps a meal for $90.00 at one of our local cafes. Now that beats the $6.00 for hawker food in Asia any day.

An even better 'mauling' can be had by checking into one of our many 'shark-infested' hotels where you can pay AUD$500 for a room at the Metropole Hotel-Burswood or even $260.00 at The Esplanade in Fremantle. For one night's sleep without breakfast of course.

And if that drives you to drink, well here's another mauling. Buy a pint of 'Stella' at the Sorrento Quay and fork-out $16.00 or SGD$22.00 for just one pint. Ouch. But you do love a good mauling don't you?

See, told you so. No need to go anywhere near the water in our city to get a good 'mauling'. And best of all, we guarantee it!

Who needs EL James' "Shades of Grey" for excitement and scary experiences when you can come to Perth?

Welcome to Oz. You little beauties!!!

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